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Wednesday, October 10, 2012

The Haunted Hayride Halloween High Achievement

Wow, this rocked bro! Sorry, had to get those words out. Last Sunday, I might have found the best Halloween event in so-cal pending a review on the new Haunted Play.

 Hidden pass the LA Zoo. Beyond some deer I saw crossing the street. Into nether realms where I wasn't suppose to go. Be careful at night folks and pay attention to the signs where you're suppose to park, because we got lost.  After all that The Haunted Hayride's glow captured us and we haven't had more fun at any Halloween event since this one, this October.

The Haunted Hayride
October  11, 14, 18, 21, 24, 25, 28, and 31
Open 7:00 pm - 10:30 pm

October 12, 13, 19, 20, 26, and 27
Open 7:00 pm - 12:00 am

Hayrides stop operating 1 hour after box office closes.

Many guests of some celebrity were there that night and field reporter Natalie D was there talking about Halloween with them. I don't think we've seen here since last Annie Awards.

After Natalie and I covered the black carpet of celebs we headed into a hay-ish hell of screams so strong I though I went death in one ear for a second, thanks Natalie. Before even entering the ride and maze portion we were blown away by the side attractions in the Purgatory section. A backwards going pony skeleton carousel grabbed our attention. The Scary Go Round is a fun sight to see, but better to ride at night than during the day, a fairly messed up child like a young Tim Burton would want it on their birthday. A mirror house entrapped us and we saw someone get ready to lose their foot and gain a new one. You see they make fingers and toes in one section. They same ones they use for horror movies. You can have one made of your entire hand and in the gentleman's case for that evening his foot. Just head to where you see all the hanging fingers. The people behind this booth also worked on the event itself so if you have any question go ahead and ask.

I can't leave out the freak show of lovely ladies, the Sinister Sirens which led multiple shows throughout the night. Is it wrong to enjoy fine ladies on beds of nails, walking on glass, performing the work of a moel on a cucumber and piercing themselves wrong? If so, I don't care. Who might? Many female audience members either needed to get in the maze or needed to get away when the act got a bit more painful looking.

Now for the main attraction! You've heard about it from your friends and not just the folks on Facebook, it's been Twittered and Instagramed and uploaded to all interfaces. It's the Haunted Hayride itself. Now take my word for it, that it was one of the best experiences I've had for Halloween this October. It has Things To Do In LA's seal of approval, hhmm there should be an app called app-proval. So spoilers will be ahead unless you just want to just grab tickets now.

Walking a path through orange fenced hay as you pass an awkward piano player and the backdrop of the woods already set the tone for the night. As your put into a cornered off gated area like some sort of infected zombie you wait for your tractor to pull up with a hay-bed being hauled behind. Did I mention the ponchos? No, well you'll need them for this one, don't worry they're provided with your ticket.

As you're loaded on your cart filled with hay you'll fill so jovial as the experience is so random from you daily commute and seems like a day on the farm. However, this is might be the darkest farm you've been to. You'll soon pass a hanging man whose lost control of his bladder. On the way up your path you'll pass the picture perfect family... that's been horribly messed up. They'll want to get in or offer you something to eat. I would not allow either.

As we passed a broken down bus and a women wailed on the ride, Natalie, we approached a nightmarish giant figure of death himself. We seemed to entire his palace of monsters and demonic dancers who didn't mind plunging out off the wall. After scaring us and enticing me with kisses we departed.

Next we went deeper in our route and disturbed a dark congregation at prayer, we shouldn't have done this. They were not happy to see us with there very bright eyes. Yet as soon as we were with this religious group we were off to a field where a strange message kept repeating. Lucky, whatever the message was for was there to pick it up with us. From there we cam across what appeared to be a UFO and some very angry CDC agents. The lighting for the UFO had such a sci-fi glow.
UFOs are nice, but onward we went meeting a private citizen who was exploring their ideas and freedom might have not been so bad if not for all the bodies. He did have some friends also exploring their feelings with chainsaws. They wished to share these feelings with us. Music was shared later on as we were treated to a demonic private rock concert of the damned.

Christmas might not be for a while, but we entered a Christmas village shortly after with evil elves. This might have been my favorite part of the ride seeing Christmas remastered into a dark version of itself, Be prepared when Santa comes out, he will make your evening truly memorable.

The night came for a close with none other then the most insidious of all evils, but clowns. They had to be clowns. You'll be entering their nightmare circus for their unruly pleasure.

The ride was remarkable for the screams, sets and themes and lasts as long as a TV show without commercials. You'll need to ride it yourself for your own thrill ride. This matched with the maze below made may night and provided such a new fun experience for Halloween.

In-Between Dark Maze

Wow, what a difference over the mazes I was in at Paranoia the other night! This one happens primarily in the dark, where one person is given a lantern to find the way out. Even though it hardly had any props the fear of not seeing where you were going made the maze ever more frightening. The start alone showed a higher level of fun with some digital window smashing.

Soon after being given a lantern I was leader of a group going into a dark maze and I don't mean a little bit dark I mean we were virtually blind through most of it and we did get lost. My group and I most of gotten lost at least six times with dead ends. Those dead ends weren't dead as multiple monsters haunted and hunted us.

Not all of the maze is indoors in the dark. Soon I lead my group through a chain link fence maze covered in white so we didn't know what was around any corner. We still took wrong turns and found ourselves back in the dark with monsters of all sort running in the night.

Shortly after we found ourselves back in the dark maze and once again I was in a tight squeeze with those fun inflatable parts of the mazes, this one making a long appearance. We were almost out at that point, but you still have to get pass ...

This might have been my favorite maze this Halloween and it lacked props and 3D, just like movies the best types of scares our from not seeing what's after you.

You should experience both of these horrors in one night. The Haunted Hayride experience really captures everything great about Halloween.

A few annoyances would be "The Congregation Theme" which was only in one area of the Hayride, it wasn't the entire theme of the night, but it's kind of billed that way. I like the theme, but just say it's an addition, not the whole idea this year. Food seems nicely priced, but when you get it the servings aren't worth it. Sunkist soda cans are only a buck so at least you can grab a cold drink, even out of a coffin. The Sunkist Blood Gulch is a lie. The poster for it enticed me, but it was just Strawberry Sunkist with a scoop of vanilla, I can do that at home. The poster looked like a nice full cup of blood colored soda, but alas it was not true. Don't screw around with someone who covers The Galco's Soda Tasting every year.