Friday, May 1, 2020

Jonathan's Friday Night Movie #1: Bloodshot

Kids, Don't Use Guns
We're starting a new movie night, so you have something to do on the weekend. I'll give you some trailers and a movie I suggest you can rent and watch with friends at the same time online in Zoom or Discord or whatever. So, get ready to make fun of these films as much as possible.

The Legend of the Stardust Brothers is one of the batsh*t crazy films from Japan you'll hear about from friends or posts from those lucky enough to have attended special screenings in England in NY last year. Sadly, this baby hasn't had a chance to be shown off in LA.

It's a musical of two Japanese dudes making it to the top in the music business in the 80's, but there's so much more weird stuff going on that it's hard to focus. I mean it's literally hard to focus with the stuff on screen at times. The trippy visuals are eye-sores. The music is a mess. One scene, in a bar where it rains on the inside was both artsy and dumb, but it made me want to cry too. Behind the scenes it the directorial debut of Astroboy creator's son Macoto Tezuka. Yup, the son of Osamu Tezuka, considered by almost everyone as the creator of anime had a son with some weird, weird ideas. We'll give you a heads up whenever it comes out legitimately in the US. Props for the DIY or sweded look.

Insert Coin, what a bunch of d*cks. Humble, might not be in their dictionary at Midway, but it's still fun to see how Mortal Kombat was made. This doc takes you back on the making of some of the best coin-ops.

This film will be dumb. Bloodshot will be egregiously stupid. For Jonathan's Friday Night Movies; I'm only suggesting films you can make fun of with friends. And that's Bloodshot. Based on a comic book you've never heard of from Vin Diesel's ego comes this million dollar action film to ridicule.

Get Bloodshot here.

You can just start making fun the second Vin Diesel opens his mouth. This one has some sort of revenge plot, Groundhog's Day scenario with the added bonus of that ever fun sci-fi trope of nanites. I would hope you know what nanites are based on the glut of video games and cartoons that use them. If not, they're microscopic machines that depending on what you're reading or watching can fix you up from a gunshot right away or build anything you want in seconds. And they can self-replicate like a virus as super speed, y'know make more of themselves really fast. Nanites do exist in real life, but in no way are how they're depicted in Bloodshot. We're just figuring out the basics. So, no instant gunshot wound fixes.

They'll be plenty to discuss as the trailer looks like the 90's never died and the plot looks as forgettable as Vin Diesel comprehension of English.
After, enjoy going over the dumbness with one of my favorite podcasts or discuss with your own friends on the train wreck you just watched.

Bloodshot (w/ Adam Scott)
How Did This Get Made? #238