Sunday, September 24, 2017

Star Trek Discovery Episode 1 & 2 Review: The Director of The Mummy Made The Worst Version Of Star Trek

For long time fans of the series Star Trek is meant to be a show with uplifting ideas of exploration, self-determination, teamwork and trying to learn more about ourselves as we explore the universe. Another part of the show can take on problems in modern times in the guise of the problems its crew faces. Subtlety is dead. All the things that made Star Trek, what Star Trek is, is dead.

Setting course for pure cheese is the terrible direction of Alex Kurtzman, who wrote on Hercules and just directed the end of the Universal's poor conceived Dark Universe, The Mummy. He starts the series with the Klingon's talking badly about the Federation then shifted to a dumb joke setting up our lead character, 1st Officer Michael Burnham played by Sonequa Martin-Green as a rookie, though she's seven years on the job. She's a girl raid by Vulcans and her emotions get the better of her. Feminists should attack this show on just how dumb that is.

Then comes one of the worst openings to a Star Trek series ever with a stupid infomercial that looks like it's selling us an app for our iPhones.

Other than just being Alex Kurtzman beating us over the head with the Federation being at war at some sh*tty metaphor for the Klingons being terroists, I'm just gonna list everything else wrong with the first and second episodes of the show.

-The show starts on the Klingons, we're here to learn along with and be part of the Federation.
-Ugly space vampire design of Klingons. 
-Strange point-of-view from Klingons that still proves their ass-holes.
-Instead of sending a probe, sending a human being in Buzz Lightyear rocket suit to explore unknown ship after a possible attack on a satellite .
-Connection to the Klingons being terrorists with no form of subtlety.
-Bizzare design of Klingon ships.
-Klingon children playing on derelict ship looks like dancing, Klingons dance for fun?
-No explanation of how Klingon's got cloak technology.
-Reverse racism with White Klingons.
-Horrible use of Sarek for nostalgia purposes.
-This is definitely set in the movie universe from the look of the show.
-Main character wanting to use deadly force first, Federation no no.
-Main character starting war with Klingons for dumb plot to work.
-Female main character needing to take advice from Father figure twice, not listening to strong female figure
-Main character making two calls to parent while being and adult on a Star Ship while second in command.
-Mutiny on Federation starship
-Three people on the crew matter, everyone else fodder, born-to-die

The show explores no new topic as the Star Trek series has covered it already be it war, war in the middle-east, terrorism and any other lazy writing they try and put in. Having a black leading actress adds nothing as both a female captain and a black captain has already been covered. I would say her character is conceived to be terrible and fight the status of what Star Trek is meant to be about and that's what Alex Kurtzman wanted for some sort of dumb arc that will eventually have tribbles.

It's probably the worst version of the show ever. It has some great visuals and a fun fight between the Klingons and Federation to pump up the viewers, but lacks any shred of Star Trek trying to expand your vision or to think.

To boldly inspire, to open new dialogue to make people think there's something else to work towards, that's what the show should be.

From the director of The Mummy, Star Trek Discovery.